by:changa (

I blame myself.

I did not truly understand the reasoning of those who came before me, and I went my own way without regard for their peculiar methods. I now, too late, come to comprehend.

I noticed the degradation as it began, and I thought little of it. It was merely a few new attitudes, ideas, nothing much. I did not comprehend the vast flood that is the internet, I forgot the teeming chaos that is always waiting behind that door.

So we have a little Krishna here, a little great spirit there, a bit of extra pantheism... I worried a tad, but then the great lords of old began culling people and frightened me so much I forgot all about it. I claimed a few meaningles theatrics, as the internet begs for them.

The site became more and more political, but hey, politics is philosophy of the masses, a brutish ignorant and clumsy tool, but none-the-less, philosophy. Something we can all gather around and push in opposing directions.

I have come to recognize something about myself, and I am displeased. I am a perspectivist, I am a person I despise, and I do not hate myself. I am so fallen in this regard that I revel in the muck that is your reality. I laugh at it, and I cower from it, but I do not believe in it.

Oh, the terrible twists of fate that have brought us thus far! Oh the wandering whispering clouds of doom that profess the glory of the coming... The only possible, imaginable, concievable world is the world that is not, yet nothing shall spring forth from nothing, and the world is darkened by its own shadow when night falls.

Alas, I cry to you, my boondoggle of great report. I welcome back the tired and determined, and I beg the energetic and foolish to be silent for a moment. I cry out for your forgiveness sensai, and if you have left, take me with you. Whither thou goest, I wouldst follow.

And I will not muck it up this time, I swear.